Enjoying the messiness...

 

I have two wonderful, crazy, and messy dogs. They bring joy, cuddles, laughs, and, well, you guessed it, messes. I have shredded rugs, window sills gnawed on, shoes with teeth marks, bare patches of dirt in the backyard, and muddy paw prints everywhere. 

Let's remember the people I live with, my teens and, the messiest in our family, my hubby. Not dirty messy, more like clutterbug. And I'm sure he's clutter-blind. Oh, he does his best with reminders, like when I remind him, "Don't forget, I like to eat at the kitchen table." Unfortunately, our breakfast room is on the way to the back door and patio, with a detached garage. John uses the table as a stopping point before putting things out in his garage. Yes, his garage. I stay out of there at all costs! 

What's my point? I feel a weird guilt almost daily over the normal messes of life in my house. I make my bed every morning around tiny messes in the corners of the room, where bags of donations have been sitting for the last month. I dust and vacuum weekly, (sometimes twice a week), while picking up the strange items John has waiting to find a home or to sell on eBay. Have I mentioned his love of vacuums? We currently own, 10, yes 10 vacuums. He's constantly looking for the perfect vacuum like I look for the perfect bag. Neither of us has found one, but quite a few work well. I work hard at staying on top of the kitchen, the laundry, and the bathrooms. They are always clean and done. Yet I think my house is a mess. 

I'm in the best self-care stage of my life. I work out regularly with Jonas, read, journal, meal plan, and cook healthy meals. I take my lunch to school. I have a real A game going! Yet, I feel like a mess. I have what's called imposter syndrome at the age of 51. How could I write a book sharing any expertise when I feel like my life is a mess? But is it? Or is it just a crazy perception I've created of myself, based on everything we see on social media? Or societal norms placed on women since the housewives of the 50s greeted their hubbies at the front door with pearls on and a martini in hand? Do I carry generational guilt? Do we? 

I'm working on reflecting on this idea and just letting it go. By acknowledging this guilt, feeling it, and releasing it, I can prevent myself from passing it on to my kids and the next generation. I'm going to enjoy the messiness!

Regardless of the messes, we always find time for family fun. March flew by and Spring has definitely sprung in Texas. 

Spring in Texas is beautiful. 

Spring break was restful and filled with family time, which we all know is my favorite. 

We love our outdoor time. OP Schnabel is our favorite park to walk and visit, especially after working out at the YMCA. 

It was great to have all four kids together. This is always a treat. 

Bananagrams bring the whole group together! Jonas also taught us Egyptian War which has been a ton of laughs and fun to play. 

We had brunch at La Panaderia and it was well worth the wait. 

Lorelei had diving all week from 9:00-12:00. She recently joined Club Diving again, in hopes of increasing her skill level and dives for her Senior year. She's now diving twice a week in the mornings and four times a week in the evenings. Dedicated girl!

She's working on her driving skills too. Last Boyen to teach to drive! Yay!! Savannah and Jonas have been helping too. 

Savannah was home on and off the week of Spring break which was so nice! I love having her home. She and Jandro did head to the beach one day on a day trip. 

Jonas and I hit the gym plenty and dragged Savannah when we could. He said he enjoys working out with her. 

We hit the movies for a girls' night out. We decided it's something we need to do more often for sure. 

Savannah went with me to run errands and get a haircut. Time for me to revisit the bob! 

I'm so excited to have found out that I won the $5,000 grant I wrote last month for a Literacy Lounge. Apple Eddie surprised me at school with music and a whole crew that presented my Apple. 

Savannah had her UT Senior/Grad pictures taken last month. The pictures came in and they are just stunning. She is so excited about her upcoming ceremony on May 11th. 

Here are a few of our favorite shots.

Today is Easter and it's been a wonderful weekend. We are getting ready to head over to my mom and dad's house for Easter and a late lunch. Savannah is home, and Bailey is stopping by before work. John, unfortunately, is working today and won't be joining us, but we will bring him leftovers.

Still making the kid's Easter baskets, but keeping them simple. 

 

I hope everyone has a glorious Easter and enjoys the messiness of it all.