Sunday, September 25, 2016

I lost my Happy…

But I’m sure I can find it somewhere.  It’s hard to complain about life being hard, when there hasn’t been a major catastrophe, illness, tragedy, or the like.  But there are times, when the day to day activities of life, just get hard sometimes.  Lately, things have been difficult with the Boyen Bunch.  The house is a bundle of stress these days.  Several of us are going through some life changes, Savannah, John, Bailey and myself are all experiencing some figurative “growing pains” while Jonas and Lorelei, may have the real growing pains going on…they are the two Boyens doing the best adjusting to this new school year.

John recently started a wonderful new job…a career change and something that I believe he will truly enjoy.  Although John is truly a brilliant mind, I believe working with his hands bring him the most enjoyment in life.  His new position at a local cabinetry shop will although him to use both.  This is a high tech shop, which has huge contracts with the local hospitals and Northside.  They were smitten with John when they heard he had an IT and finance background AND knew how to use power tool and do carpentry…the perfect candidate.  But any new job brings stress.  He loves it, but is exhausted from the heat of the shop and hours of training he’s engaged in right now.  Next week he moves to the office, now that he has learned how all the big machines work.  He’s looking forward to that.

Bailey and Savannah are going through the normal difficulties that teenagers often do.  I’ll spare too many details, as teens don’t appreciate their business being spewed across the internet.  It’s all the usual stuff, boys, girls, homework, jobs, friends, and life choices.  So much to think about all the time is exhausting for their young hearts and minds. 

And then, there’s me, the mama.  It’s my job to keep it all together, be the strong one.  But sometimes, I snap too, under the stress of it all.  Work and teaching are usually the easy part of my life, but that’s not the case this year.  It’s been a very challenging year in the classroom.  Funny enough, it’s not the kids.  My classes are just wonderful.  They make me laugh and have wonderful discussions and teach me a little something every day.  My 5th grade team is just wonderful too.  They are so supportive at school and about my life at home.   It’s really all those little things that bog teacher’s down…paper work, meetings, schedules, not enough time, too many to do’s.  September isn’t normally that hard of a month.  October has traditionally been the difficult month, with parent teacher conferences.  I can only hope that because September gave me so much hell…maybe October will give me a break!

So about that happy I lost…with some wise advice from my two teammates and friends, I was reminded that I just need to find a way to get a little time to myself.  Frequently I’m just so busy fulfilling everyone else’s needs, and then I forget about my own.  When that happens, I don’t even know what it is that I need.  When I become mindful of the stress and realize that my own needs are important too, I almost instantly become more centered, even if I haven’t done a thing for myself.  It’s almost like because I remember I’m here, I’m human, I have needs…everything resets.  I found my happy.

Last night was Homecoming and seeing Savannah so happy, certainly help make my heart happy.  It's a whole different experience for us now to have a daughter in high school.  Bailey was and still is not into things like Homecoming and dances.  

The mum thing, remains a mystery to me...but we played along!

Making her first mum for a friend...

Ready to dance the night away...without the boys!

Growing up so fast...

She loves her little Lorelei.

John made me...

Now that the reset button has been pressed...I'm hoping my happy stays around for a long while.  If not friends...remind me when it's time to reset.

1 comment: